NEED TO KNOW
A 23-year-old man says he "sternly" refused to accept leftovers from his girlfriend's mother
He said the moment got awkward, and now he's unsure if he overreacted
The man shared his story on Reddit, where people were split on if he handled the situation in the right way
A man "sternly" refusedto accept leftoversfrom his girlfriend's mom, and he's now unsure if he mishandled the situation.
The 23-year-old detailed his story on the popular Reddit forum, "Am I the A------," a place where Redditors go to seek advice about interpersonal dilemmas. Inhis post, the man said that he, his 22-year-old girlfriend and their parents all recently attended a local trivia night together.
"Her parents brought a lot of food, which was very welcome and appreciated by everyone at the table," he continued, adding, "I ate more than my fair share."
The original poster went on to say that it was "overall a good night," but things took a turn near the end of the evening as they were all getting ready to leave.
"Skip to the end of the night, and her parents are deliberating on how much food they have leftover andwhat to do with it," he explained.
He said that his girlfriend's mother offered them food that they did "not have the fridge space for," and so he "politely" declined. However, he said that the woman kept "persisting," and told him she had specifically brought extra food to give to them.
"It seemed very clear to me that she was trying to avoid taking anything home with her, which I understand, but we simply couldn't take more … She continues to prod, and even starts to hand the items to my girlfriend after I said no," he continued.
Never miss a story — sign up forPEOPLE's free daily newsletterto stay up-to-date on the best of what PEOPLE has to offer, from celebrity news to compelling human interest stories.
The man said he grew"visibly frustrated,"and then "sternly" told the woman, "I said no, please respect that" — which is when things got awkward.
"Everyone gets quiet and looks at me uncomfortably," he said. "My dad comes up to me and says, "'It's a gift, you should accept it politely.' "
"In my opinion, it felt disrespectful, because it seemed more like she was trying to force me to take food that she didn't know what to do with after I said we couldn't take it," he continued, adding that it was an "absurd" amount of food to ask them to take.
The PEOPLE Puzzler crossword is here! How quickly can you solve it? Play now!
The distressed man said that he ultimately took the food to avoid "an argument," but had to "throw a good amount of it away" regardless.
"AITA [am I the a------]?" he asked at the end of his post.
Many Redditors thought he could have handled the situation with more grace.
"I agree she was pushy and presumptuous, but … I think taking home abit of extra foodand throwing it out is such a trivial burden that it wasn't worth making everyone else in the room uncomfortable by 'sternly' refusing it. Listen to your dad. YTA [you're the a------]," one person said.
Another person added, "This is a good example of the difference between being right (you can refuse stuff, you didn't have the room) and being polite and a likeable human. If you spoke to her mom like that I'm assuming now everyone not only thinks YTA, but are also rude as hell. She might have been misguided or a bit pushy, but to describe her as disrespectful is completely over the top."
"You chose the wrong hill to die on. Good luckfixing this mess," said someone else.
However, others disagreed, with one person replying, "People have to learn that no means no. If people refuse to accept your no politely like adults do, it's fine to get a bit more stern."
Another person agreed, writing, "If you accept once, she will continue to bring excess food telling you to take it home."
They continued, sharing some advice on how they'd respond in the future: "Just say 'no thank you, goodnight everyone' and walk out the door. Don't continue any conversation in relation to the food."
Read the original article onPeople
